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How to approach estate planning discussions with family 

On Behalf of | May 12, 2025 | Estate Planning

Estate planning isn’t just about legal documents and distribution strategies—it’s also about finding ways to transfer wealth to the next generation harmoniously. Yet, for many families, talking about money, death and the future can feel awkward or even taboo. 

Whether you’re a parent hoping to organize your affairs or an adult child trying to help aging parents prepare, approaching estate planning with clarity and care is essential. Beginning this conversation at the right time and keeping it productive can help ensure peace in the family. 

Start early, start small

One of the biggest mistakes families make is waiting too long to talk about estate planning. Rather than waiting for a crisis or major health scare, bring it up while everyone is calm and healthy. You don’t need to jump into legal jargon or talk about who gets what right away. A gentle opener like, “I’ve been thinking about our future and how we can make things easier for each other,” can create a safe, open door to deeper discussions. 

Make it about care, not control

Estate planning isn’t about who’s in charge or who gets the biggest share—it’s about helping to ensure the family is cared for and chaos is avoided in times of stress. Emphasize the following emotional benefits: 

  • Peace of mind 
  • Fewer misunderstandings 
  • The ability to honor each other’s wishes

If you’re bringing this up with your parents or older relatives, show respect and curiosity rather than pushing an agenda. Ask, “Have you thought about what you’d want in case of an emergency?” or “Is there anything important we should know if something unexpected happens?” These kinds of open-ended questions invite dialogue without pressure. 

Approaching the discussion around estate planning with compassion, honesty and a willingness to listen can bring families closer together. By starting early, staying respectful and enlisting suitable legal support, you can turn what once felt like a difficult topic into a gift of clarity and connection for generations to come. 

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